Today was worse than yesterday. I wonder if it was because I drank two cups of coffee.
Anyhow, I had eight accidents today. How disappointing is that? And come to think of it, I had caffeine yesterday also. I had Doctor Pepper from McDonalds, and fountain sodas really make me go. So, I know I am going to have to give all of those up without a doubt. I just hate that because I feel like I have already had to give up so much in the way of diet that I feel upset about giving up just one more thing. But if I want to keep the accidents down, I am going to have to cut them out of my diet. And that will mean no more drinking for me, either. I have to give up the alcohol because that will also make my bladder work, and Lord knows I do not need that.
I wonder how a child feels when he or she is potty training for the first time and has to get used to something completely different. I wonder how much worse that child feels when he or she has accidents. What this is reinforcing for me is that when it comes time for me to potty train my own children, I will never punish, yell, or scold for accidents. Doing such things is pointless and stupid! I was never treated that way when I was growing up, and thank God I was not, or else I would have been severely traumatized. My family has always been very understanding of my problems, so I will treat my children in the same way and extend to them the same courtesy. I will also teach my children to be accepting of others who have problems like these. I do not want my children being ignorant like the rest of society and going around and judging people for things they cannot help. I want to contribute to bringing forth a more understanding generation, a generation that will accept people with various problems and treat them like humans instead of specimens.
I hope I have better news tomorrow. I am going to cut out the coffee and all caffeine products and see how I do. I know it is too early to expect results yet from the meds, but I am willing to try anything. I will certainly see how much difference it makes when I do not have my daily cups of coffee. And boy is that going to be very difficult because I have chronic fatigue. I am also going to have to cut it all out when I do my bladder diary this coming Tuesday. Tuesday, I will chart how I am affected without the caffeine. Wednesday, I will drink the caffeine like I normally do and chart the differences.
End of rant.